My life has often felt like an endless round of battles, from neighbour disputes to stealing your parking space. It’s easy to try and take advantage of a 5ft woman who clearly doesn’t have a back-up team.
The problem with all of this, is that it makes me aggressive. Clearly not physically, but verbally, I can go toe to toe with anyone, and cut them down to size in a few sentences.
I hate being pushed into a corner so that I feel I have to come out fighting. I hate turning into the human equivalent of Scrappy doo.
It’s taken a long time, but I’ve realised that I don’t have to respond in a way that leaves me feeling uncomfortable; I don’t have to respond to potential bullies by shrinking them down to size.
I’ve realised that smiling at the person that shoves you out of the way, and feeling pity for the competitor you know has left you a fraudulent, bad review, is the better way. Killing them with kindness, removes you from the negative world that they’re clearly stuck in, without feeling that they’re somehow, getting away with it.
And far from feeling trampled on, paradoxically it builds respect. Bullies can’t engage in power games with someone who seems to see right through their bad behaviour and realises that this is nothing personal. More importantly, you build respect for yourself when you realise you don’t have to bring it, in order for them to back down and behave.